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So it’s over, and you move on. Weezer starts to release terrible albums-more and more terrible albums, and then a Snuggie, and then a song entitled “I’m Your Daddy,” featuring lead vocals by a thirty-nine-year-old man who is in fact an actual father, and it is about hitting on a girl at a party using this phrase like he’s twenty-two and was raised without human contact in a basement, and he doesn’t get that he’s embarrassing himself. And at this point, no one, including you, understands what you saw in Weezer.

And then you write an essay about the whole deal, and you actually listen to both “Pinkerton” and the “Blue Album” many times, and at some point you realize that “In the Garage” actually prefigured every awful Apatovian man-child film you have ever hated the sauce out of, and at some point you remember that “No One Else” exists, and you listen to the lyrics to that one for the first time in over a decade, and oh my God it is AWFUL. It is worse than ANYTHING on “Pinkerton.” I want a girl who will laugh for no one else, when I’m away she puts her makeup on the shelf, when I’m away she never leaves the house: I mean, that’s not some deep hidden misogyny you uncovered because you’re so paranoid/clever. Those are just the words. It’s like a musical installment of Twilight. If a friend were dating a dude who talked like this, you’d start leaving checklists of Signs That You Are In An Abusive Relationship all over her apartment. Which is where you would have to be, because that would be the only way you could see her, because when he was away she would never! Leave! The house!!! And at that point, you will know that the end was in the beginning; it was never going to work between you and Rivers Cuomo. I knew it, anyway. There is some grace in the recognition.

—

Rivers Cuomo Messes You Up Forever

(via captain-sonic)

this is really depressing and super true and GODDAMNIT I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW WHO I WAS UNTIL PINKERTON WHY ARE YOU SO AWFUL RIVERS

(via mcgoats)

oh my god i FORGOT about those awful songs, even as a teenager that last song gave me the creeps

(via hupsoonheng)

(via misskatehate)